The RoboColum(n)

I often find myself in a unique position where I see the funny side of language use or where I am consulted on best use of language. Two recent examples spring to mind.

The first was a quote by a celebrity who having had a hit record in the 1980s considered himself “vaguely famous”. Now I would say that you can’t be vaugely famous. You’re either famous or your not. It’s not relative or subjective. If someone has heard of your name, you are famous whether it is 10 or 10,000,000 people. “Vaguely famous” = an oxymoron!

The second example occurred last Friday when a colleague came and asked whether “Dr.” should have a full stop after it. “Yes”, I replied, “It is an abbreviation for “Doctor” and as such should always have a full stop.” The answer went down like a lead balloon but it was the follow up question that really made me chuckle. “Do you have any standards that says that we have to have a full stop?” The documentation in question was for a marketing leaflet which has its own style guide for which I am not responsible. Unfortunately, the style guide didn’t cover such idiosyncrasies so they came to the oracle for a second opinion. The documentation team style guide didn’t cover this either (we don’t have much call for abbreviated titles) but I suggested they stick with my suggestion.

It transpired the reason why my answer was unacceptable was that it generated more work that would take an additional 30 minutes to put right. It was only when I reminded them that they had already wasted that time and more involving the whole of the marketing team and now me and one of the Technical Authors, that they went away with their tail between the legs.

Tish! Tish! One must have standards!